OMG...my three year old daughter can lick her elbow. I AM IN FOR YEARS OF TROUBLE...I KNOW THIS FOR SURE.

As for the conversation starters (the original intent of this thread) many thanks to Jackflash. I think these were only to tweek others into checking out the info for themselves or , at the very least, throw out some trivia challange to you.

You all seem to have taken the challange and do some searching for yourselves. Adding to the wealth of knowledge on the internet and this site.

many thanks to you all.

I did try to lick mine...alas I failed. when my daughter saw me try, she asked what I was doing then (to my amazement) showed me hows it's done.

Happy Valentines day guys.

kglack43

and to add to the day's theme...:

The History of Valentine's Day

Every February, across the country, candy, flowers, and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St. Valentine. But who is this mysterious saint and why do we celebrate this holiday? The history of Valentine's Day -- and its patron saint -- is shrouded in mystery. But we do know that February has long been a month of romance. St. Valentine's Day, as we know it today, contains vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition. So, who was Saint Valentine and how did he become associated with this ancient rite? Today, the Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred.

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men -- his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl -- who may have been his jailor's daughter -- who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed 'From your Valentine,' an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic, and, most importantly, romantic figure. It's no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France.

Thats something I never knew, cheers for putting it up.

I'm spending Valentines day stuck in a computing lab trying to write up my final year report. Its all about the fatigue life of embedded cracks and I am getting pretty bored

Its good to learn something new and this forum is a good way to have a break from work :-)

Cheers

Jamie

There is still a law on the English statute books that a man is permitted to shoot Welsh people with an English Longbow from the battlements of Hereford castle on a Sunday as long as a member of the clergy is present.


Dave

In Scotland it is illegal to be drunk whilst in possession of a cow.

Check out the following site for some other strange laws

http://www.funfacts.com.au/weird-international-laws/

Jamie

In England it remains technically illegal:

for members of Parliament to wear armour, whilst attending in the House

to eat mince pie on Christmas Day (actually all Christmas fare is illegal).


Plus:
It is illegal to impersonate a Chelsea Pensioner.

Alabama:


It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. [Thanks to Tiffany Dozier]
It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church. [Thanks to Tiffany Dozier]
Putting salt on a railway track may be punishable by death. [Thanks to Tiffany Dozier]
Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. [Thanks to Tiffany Dozier]
You cannot chain your alligator to a fire hydrant. [Thanks to Ben Chastain]
Peanuts are not allowed to be sold in Lee County, Alabama after sunset on Wednesdays. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
It is legal to drive the wrong way on a one way street if you have a lantern on the front of your car. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]

Alaska:


You can't look at a moose from an aeroplane. [Thanks to Dave Knott]
Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear and take a picture for photo opportunities. [Thanks to Kyle Brown]
It is an offence to push a live moose out of a moving aeroplane. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
It is State Policy that all emergencies are held to a minimum. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]

Arkansas:


It is illegal to mispronounce Arkansas while in Arkansas [Thanks to Aaron Parmet for that one]

California:


Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub [Thanks to Meagin Caza for that one]
Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses. [Thanks to Caleb Hicks]
A city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits. [Thanks to Caleb Hicks]

Colorado:


It is illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out on the streets after 7 p.m. [Thanks to Molly Lane]

Connecticut:


You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
A pickle is not officially a pickle unless it bounces [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected] for that one]

Florida:


Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
(SARASOTA) It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal. [Thanks to Dave Knott]
It is illegal to fart in a public place after 6:00pm on a Thursday. [Thanks to John Andrews]
It is illegal to have sexual intercourse with a porcupine. [Thanks to Allison Neely]
It is illegal for a woman to bungie jump naked on Sunday before midday. [Thanks to Danny Giffen]

Georgia


It is illegal to tie a giraffe to a lamp post.[Thanks to Saz for that]
It is illegal to take a bath of orange peel.[Thanks to Saz for that]
In Peachtree City, it is illegal to be homeless. [Thanks to Kathy Doan]
Hawaii:


In Hawaii you will be fined if you do not own a boat. [Thanks to Renee for that]

Illinois:
Except for the first two, the following Illinois laws were kindly supplied to me by Angelique N. Morris, who also helpfully provided sources. I have simply copy/pasted her material below, with insertion of the necessary HTML code and a little different punctuation:


It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets.
It is illegal to eat in a restaurant if it is on fire. [Thanks to Kristofer Swärdståhl]
You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
The English language is not to be spoken.
City Laws in Illinois:

Carbondale
No one may stand on the sidewalk on the 500 block of Illinois Ave.
Champaign
One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.
Chicago

All businesses entering into contracts with the city must sift through their records and report any business they had dealing with slaves during the era of slavery.

Indiana:


Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
Citizens are not allowed to attend a cinema or theatre nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.
In South Bend, Indiana, it is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
Men are not allowed to be "discernibly turgent" in public. [Thanks to Shannon Brouwer]

Iowa:


Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
One-armed piano players must perform for free. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
In Dubuque any hotel in the city limits must have a water bucket and a hitching post in front of the building. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
In Indianola the ”Ice Cream Man” and his truck are banned. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
In Fort Madison the fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
In Marshalltown horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]
Within the city limits of Ottumwa a man may not wink at any woman he does not know. [Thanks to Nick Davis of Ottumwa, Iowa]

Kansas:


It is illegal to put ice cream on cherry pie in Kansas. [Thanks to Tyler for that]
In Wichita, at the intersection of Douglas and Broadway, all motorists are required to stop at the intersection, exit their vehicles, and fire three shotgun rounds, before continuing on their way. [Thanks to Tyler for that]
It is illegal to hunt whales. [Thanks to Mitch Moore for that]

Kentucky:


By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground".
It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
It is illegal to shoot game out of the window of a moving vehicle, with the exception of a whale [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected]]
A woman can not buy a hat without the husband's permission [Thanks to Mackenzie]

Louisana:


It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault", while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault".

Maine:


After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
You may not step out of a plane in flight. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
In Portland shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected] for that]
Maryland:


You cannot swear while inside the city limits of Baltimore.
You cannot throw a bail of hay out of a second story window in Annapolis. [Thanks to Kathleen for those two] Thanks to Heather Seek]

Massachusetts:


Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour. [Thanks to Chrisi C for that]
It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder. [Thanks to Leon Pool]

Michigan:
Except for the first one, the following Michigan laws were kindly sent to me by Jayme Fisher, who found them at http://www.bitoffun.com/stupid_laws_Michigan.htm:


It is legal for the blind to hunt, and they don't need anyone with them. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat's head brought into a town office.
It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
You may not swear in front of women and children. (Repealed)
Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
It is illegal to kill a dog using a decompression chamber.
There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens. (Clawson)
Couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property. (Detroit)
Wilfully destroying your old radio is prohibited. (Detroit)
It is illegal for a man to scowl at his wife on Sunday. (Detroit)
It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose. According to history and animal husbandry, it prevents them from "rooting" in the ground for their food. (Detroit)
Security guards at Joe Louis Arena will confiscate any item they feel might be thrown onto the ice. Furthermore, any person seen throwing an octopus onto the ice at a Red Wings game will be taken to jail. (Detroit)
No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense. (Grand Haven)
It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets. (Harper Woods)
It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend. (Kalamazoo)
All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police. (Rochester)
Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day. (Wayland)
Smoking while in bed is illegal (Soo)
Alligators may not be tied to fire hydrants.
Minnesota:


It is illegal to give or receive oral sex [Thanks to Kiersten Pencap for that one - but Ryan Rogers assures me it has been repealed]
It is illegal to walk across the Minnesota-Wisconsin border with a duck on your head. [Thanks to Martina A. Tuckner]
It is illegal to have sex in any other position other than missionary. [Thanks to Martina A. Tuckner]
It is illegal to drive a red car down main street on Sundays. [Thanks to Martina A. Tuckner]
It is illegal to have two or more forms of state issued identification. [Thanks to Ryan Rogers]

Mississippi:


If an individual leaves his residence, or place of business, without the direct intent of injuring (killing) someone, they can not be tried for any offence. [Thanks to Les Easterling, whose friend was killed by a truck driver who escaped penalty thanks to this law]
Montana:


It is a law that "When you get out of prison you are granted a horse and $100 or a bus ticket to anywhere." Whatever you may choose. [Thanks to Geoff Whitehead for that.]

Nebraska:


A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service.

New Jersey:


In Newark it is illegal to buy ice cream after 6:00 p.m. [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected] for that one]
It's also illegal in this state to throw a bad pickle on the street. [Thanks to Zelda for that.]
In Berkley Heights you may not walk your cattle on the street on Sunday. [Thanks to John for that.]

New Mexico:


Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.
It has been outlawed for people to dance around a Sombrero. [Thanks to "Iridis"]

New York:


A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
Jumping off a building is punishable by death (this includes the Empire State building). [Thanks to Chrisi C for that and to Georgina for a correction to the wording]
It is illegal to shoot a rabbit from a moving trolley. [Thanks to Jacob Egloff]

North Carolina:


Elephants may not be used to plough cotton fields. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart. Making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
It's against the law to sing off key. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
A marriage can be declared void if either of the two persons is physically impotent. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
In Barber, North Carolina fights between cats and dogs are prohibited. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
In Chapel Hill, North Carolina it is a misdemeanor to urinate or defecate publicly. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
In Charlotte, NC, woman must have their bodies covered with at least 16 yards of cloth at all times. [Thanks to Adam Bowers]
If a man and woman who are not married to each other live together "lewdly and lasciviously" they can be fined $1,000 and be sentenced to up to 60 days in gaol. This 200 year old law is still actually enforced! [From a recent newspaper report]
North Dakota:


Beer & pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.

Ohio:


Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
In Columbus, Ohio it is illegal to sell cornflakes on Sunday. [Thanks to an unknown contributor with a Hotmail address and JC in Ohio]
In Marysville, Ohio it is illegal for a dog to urinate on a parking meter. (There are no parking meters in Marysville.) [Thanks to an unknown contributor with a Hotmail address and JC in Ohio]
It is illegal to fish for whales on Sundays. [Thanks to Kyle Brown and JC in Ohio]
It is legal to throw a snake at someone but it is illegal to shake a snake at someone. [Thanks to Kyle Brown]
It is illegal for women to wear footwear of any kind with an open toe. [Thanks to "Iridis"]
It's against the law to kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church without a licence. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
It is illegal to get a fish drunk. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Owners of tigers must notify authorities within one hour if the tiger escapes. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
The Ohio driver's education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Participating in or conducting a duel is prohibited. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Breast feeding is not allowed in public. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
If you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25.00. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
No person while operating a motor vehicle shall fail to slow down and stop said vehicle when signalled to do so upon meeting or overtaking a horse-drawn vehicle or person on horseback and to remain stationary until such vehicle or person has passed, provided such signal to stop is given in good faith, under circumstances of necessity, and only as often and for such length of time as is required of such vehicle or person to pass, whether it is approaching from the front or rear. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
A police office can write you a ticket for leavign your keys in your car. But relax he will leave you a note when you can come get your keys back so long as you can prove it's your car and your keys. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Bay Village - It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Bexley - Ordinance number 223, of 09/09/19 prohibits the installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Canton - It is a misdemeanor to play any game in a public park without the Superintendent's permission. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Canton - Electric fences are banned. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Cincinnati - Anal intercourse is banned. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Clinton County - Any person who leans against a public building will be subject to fines. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Cleveland - It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Fairview Park - It's against the law to honk your horn "excessively". A grandmother was fined for honking her horn twice at her neighbour. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Fairview Park - Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had the owner's permission. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Ironton - Cross-dressing is against the law. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Lima - Any map that does not have Lima clearly stated on the map cannot be sold. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Lowell - It is unlawful to run a horse over five miles per hour. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Marion - You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
North Canton - It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the police. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
McDonald - Your goose may not paraded down Main Street. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Oxford - It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Oxford - It is unlawful for a woman to appear in public while unshaven. This includes legs and face. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Paulding - A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him. However, the reverse is not true, even if it's a police dog. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Strongsville - Catch 22 is banned. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]
Youngstown - You may not run out of gas/petrol. [Thanks to JC in Ohio]

Oklahoma:


Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
It is illegal to kiss anyone of not purely American nationality on the 4th July. [Thanks to "Iridis"]

Oregon:


You must let your dishes drip dry. [Thanks to Martina A. Tuckner]
Pennsylvania:


A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.
If a motorist sees a horse coming down the road, the driver must pull off to the side of the road and cover the vehicle with canvas. If the horse is still scared the driver must get out of his car and take it apart until the horse isn't scared any more. [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected] for that one, and for additonal parts/correction my thanks to Patrick Heller]
In the Mount Pocono region any group of 5 or more Native Americans are to be considered a raiding party and may be killed on the spot. [Thanks to Ken DelRio for that.]
In Philadelphia, you can't put pretzels in bags (based on an Act of 1760). [Thanks to Dave Knott]
It is illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
Every outlet or switch (which can be purchased for 59 cents) that is installed requires an electrical inspection fee of 1 dollar and 33 cents. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
It is required that a woman have a permit to wear cosmetics. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
One cannot run for governor unless he/she has participated in a duel. [Thanks to Dennis]
In Morrisville,Pennsylvania a woman needs a permit to wear make-up. [Thanks to Dennis]
In Tarentum,Pennsylvania it is illegal to tie horses to parking meters. [Thanks to Dennis]
In Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania it is illegal to bring a burro onto a streetcar. [Thanks to Dennis]

Rhode Island:


Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void. [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected] for sending that within 24 hours of my appeal for anything from this state]
It's illegal to purchase a garbage disposal made in Cape Verde under the State Constitution. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected]]

South Carolina


It is legal to beat your wife on a Sunday morning on the steps of the state house. [Thanks to Ashleigh McGee for that one]

South Dakota


No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. [Thanks to Chris Cole for that one]
It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory. [Thanks to Chris Cole for that one]
Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden. [Thanks to Chris Cole for that one]
If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them. [Thanks to Chris Cole for that one] 5.If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon. [Thanks to Chris Cole for that one]

Tennessee:


It is illegal to catch a fish with a lasso. [Thanks to an anonymous sender at [email protected]]
Driving is not to be done while asleep. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
It is illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 p.m. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]
It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises. [Thanks to Susan Goodgine]

Texas:


A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
It is legal to commit a homicide as long as you tell the person when, and how you are going to kill them. [Thanks to Ashleigh McGee for that one]
In Houston you cannot buy beer after midnight on Sunday, but you can buy it on Monday. [Thanks to [email protected] for that]
There is an old law in Texas that states you are unable to tuck your pants into one boot unless you own ten or more cattle. [Thanks to [email protected] for that]
It is illegal to spit on the sidewalk. [Thanks to [email protected] also for that]
If two trains going in opposite directions on the same track meet each other, one can't move until the other does. [Thanks to Casey Le for that one]
It is illegal to carry a pair of wire-cutters in your back pocket. [Thanks to Matthew Harris of Texas for that and to Brandon Taylor-Nelson for a small correction to it]
In Dallas County it is illegal to own any realistic looking, phallic shaped, personal massager more than one foot in length. [Thanks to Matthew Harris of Texas for that and to Brandon Taylor-Nelson for a small correction to it]
In Corpus Christie it is illegal to raise alligators in your home. [Thanks to Dave Knott]
It is illegal to have an open container in a car. (It doesn't specify alcohol, it just says an open container.) [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
It is illegal to have anything protruding from your bumper unless it is attached with a chain (so bumper stickers are a no-no). [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
It is legal for the blind to go hunting as long as they have someone with them who isn't blind. (Compare with the similar law in Michigan.) [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
It is legal for a husband to beat his wife as long as he uses something no bigger than his thumb. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor]
When you are released from jail, you must be given a horse and a shotgun, if you request it. [Thanks to Chris]
It is legal to fire a gun at someone if they are handed it to them by the victim first. [Thanks to "Iridis"]
In Galveston, if you sit on the sidewalk, you could be fined $200. [Thanks to Cindy Neal]
It is illegal to milk another persons cow. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected]]
It is illegal to shoot a buffalo from the 2nd story of a hotel. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected]]
It is illegal to drive without windscreen wipers. You don't need a windscreen but, you must have the wipers. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected]]
The entire Encyclopedia Brittannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home. [Thanks to an anonymous contributor at [email protected]]

Vermont:


Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week -- on Saturday night.

Washington:


All lollipops are banned.
A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town".
"It shall be unlawful for a candidate for office or for nomination thereto whose name appears upon the ballot at any election to give to or purchase for another person, not a member of his or her family, any liquor in or upon any premises licensed by the state for the sale of any such liquor by the drink during the hours that the polls are open on the day of such election." [Thanks to Christina Montosa] [This is in fact far less restrictive than the similar British law.]
It is illegal to deflower a virgin even on their wedding day. [Thanks to Andrew Davis]
It is illegal to catch a fish by throwing a rock at it. [Thanks to Georgina]
In Seattle it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon that is over 6 feet in length. [Thanks to Georgina]
In Seattle if a woman is sitting on a man's lap while riding a bus, train, or trolley, there must be a pillow between them. [Thanks to Georgina]
In Bellingham it is illegal for a woman to take any steps that are not in the backwards direction while dancing. [Thanks to Georgina]

West Virginia:


No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions".
It is illegal to put an ice cream cone in your pocket on Sundays. [Thanks to Crystal M. Chandler]
It is illegal to spit on any sidewalk which women may walk down. (The reasoning behind this law is back in the old days women wore the long floor length dresses and their dresses would drag through the spit!!) [Thanks to Crystal M. Chandler]

[quote] [b]Ohio:



Pennsylvania:


No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.



I wouldn't be a fan of this law. Better to remain unmarried I think

Jamie

This was a direct result of a terrible accident that occured during one of the first government sponsored wildlife transports for re-population during the winter of 1924. There was also a best selling book that originated from the short story in the Saturday Evening Post for Feb. 1925. It was originally titled, "Antlers in the Pines" by Hoogoozed D'amoose.

Alabama:

It is illegle to drink in the presence of cattle, er...that is unless the cow is buying and he's a Bama fan. Anything else that happens between you and the farm animal is strictly your business.

kevin (drinking with cattle for four decades now)

OMG that one hurts! :-)

My grandmother told me that Coke was green in her day. You are the second person to verify that!!!!!

The wife would most likely agree but I don't think it gets me off the hook.

The problem with most jokes like those is that while they are illegal, it's not for those specific reasons. Case in point;

"It's also illegal in this state to throw a bad pickle on the street."

Of course. It's called littering.

Ok there I was, getting up to go to work on 12-8am shift and by my backpack in the kitchen was a couple of sheets of paper that our family dogs had used to rid their frustrations on. The printing was pretty clear so it was probably the male Silky Terrier, Neuterd...Fonzy

"Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans

1. Blaming your farts on me...not funny...not funny at all !!!

2. Yelling at me for barking. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!

3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Stop it!

5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why
we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo
Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.

7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised
when I freak out every time we go back!

8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but
I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

9. Dog sweaters. Hello ??? Haven't you noticed the fur?

10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know
the truth. You're just jealous.

Now lay off me on some of these things, We both know who's boss here!!! You don't see me picking up your poop do you ???

Love Fonzy and Desi"

Guilty too!

Well I resisted the urge to lick my elbow, but I think that is related to the fact that a few hours earlier while tring tree brnaches i scratched my lower arm and discovered some blood running down it and as I lack vampire inclinations... I have heard that one of everyones favorite words dealt with old sailing ships and their leaking water tendancies. Bags of cow manure were shipped with a big stamp with letters on them which meant "ship high in transit "as they would swell and burst the bag if they got real wet. I do know the word has been around and meant what it has meant for a real long time...

A husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf. Of course, the wife promptly sliced her first shot right through the window of the biggest house adjacent to the course.


The husband cringed, "I warned you to be careful! Now we'll have to go up there, find the owner, apologize and see how much your lousy drive is going to cost us."



So the couple walked up to the house and knocked on the door. A warm voice said, "Come on in."


When they opened the door they saw the damage that was done: glass was all over the place, and a broken antique bottle was lying on its sidenear the pieces of window glass.


A man reclining on the couch wereing silk pajamas and a turban asked, "Are you the people that broke my bottle?"


"Uh...yeah!, sir. We're sure sorry about that," the husband replied.


"Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you. You see, I'm a genie, and I've been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years.


Now that you've released me, I'm allowed to grant three wishes. I'll give you each one wish, but if you don't mind, I'll keep the last one for myself."

Wow, that's great!" the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted out, "I'd like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life."

"No problem," said the genie "You've got it, it's the least I can do. And I'll guarantee you a long, healthy life!"

"And now you, young lady, what do you want?" the genie asked.


"I'd like to own a gorgeous home complete with servants in every country in the world," she said.

"Consider it done," the genie said. "And your homes will always be safe from fire, burglary and natural disasters!"


"And now," the couple asked in unison, "what's your wish, genie?"



"Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, and haven't been with a woman in more than a thousand years, my wish is to have pleasure with your wife."


The husband looked at his wife and said, "Gee, honey, you know we both now have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?"

She mulled it over for a few moments and said, "You know, you're right. Considering our good fortune, I guess I wouldn't mind, but what about you, honey?"

You know I love you sweetheart," said the husband. I'd do the same for you!"


So the genie and the woman went upstairs where they spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying each other. The genie was insatiable. After about three hours of non-stop intense pleasure, the genie rolled over and looked directly into her eyes and asked, "How old are you and your husband?"

"Why, we're both 35," she responded breathlessly.


"No kidding," he said. "Thirty-five years old and both of you still believe in genies?"

A thread right up my alley. A bunch of useless information capped off by a good joke.

HOW TO DRIVE IN SOUTH FLORIDA:


1. You must first learn to pronounce the name, it is: "FLAARIDA".

2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.

3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 85 mph. On I-95 your speed is expected to match the highway number. Anything less is grounds to run you off the road while giving you the finger.

4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. South Florida has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, SUV cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.

5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.

6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot.

7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in South Florida. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting.

8. Hollywood Blvd and Pines is the same road although some call it Pembroke Pines Rd, which then gets confused with Pembroke Rd. which is just one traffic light over. Hallandale Beach Blvd is the same as Miramar Parkway which is not a parkway at all. And if that isn't enough to remember Arvida Parkway which is also not a parkway at all has been renamed Royal Palm Blvd not to be mixed up with the Royal Palm Blvd located in Margate and Coral Springs (Which turns into Copans in Coconut Creek).

9. Of Course there is some confusion when you get to McNab as to where it starts and where it ends. And more than several hundred people have run through the barricades of Haitus Rd. which dead ends flat off a major intersection.

10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been accidentally activated.

11. Merge means race like a madman and cut the person in line off or better yet ---run them off the road.

12 For summer driving, it is advisable to wear potholders on your hands.

13. If you are going to yell anything out the window, make sure it is in any language other than english.

here's some from my army days:

In singapore, it is illegal for a male citizen aged 16 years and above who are eligible for compulsory military service or is in military service to travel outside the country unless given an exit permit by the ministry of defence. (not so funny at this stage). It is also the citizen's duty to ensure that his/her passport remains valid at all times. (not so illogical either). BUT

whilst serving in the army, I was informed through the mail by the passport office that I had to renew my passport since it had expired and I had to make a trip down to the passport office to get it renewed. was turned down by passport officer, who will only renew my passport only if I had an exit permit from the army. the army will not issue me with an exit permit unless I had a valid reason for going out of country. (which I hadn't, I was just trying to obey one law and got stung by the other one) final solution: I applied for overseas leave on a trip to NOWHERE to secure an exit permit which allowed my passport to be renewed. my CO signed on that one with a bemused look...which leads to this fact:

The Law's an Ass

Illegal to travel + illegal to have an invalid passport + post official being difficult.
Does the law say that it is illegal to renew the passport without the exit permit from the ministry? If the law only says that it is the actual travel which is illegal I would have asked to see the post officials manager and in the worst case reported him to the police since he was preventing you from fulfilling your civic duties.
/ Robin

ha! I wish it worked like that here. the funny thing was actually filling in a form saying that I was on a trip to NOWHERE and that it was enough to keep the officials happy...

In Morton Grove Illinois it is illegal to own a gun of any kind. In Kennesaw Georgia your are required to own a gun.

Guess which city has almost NO crime?