Guys if you didn't already realize it, I'm nuttier than a fruitcake.lol It's been confirmed by far too many people now.

fruitcake has nuts? :-) :-) :-) :-)

Don't listen to her Greatbrit. She's nuts

She's nuts? I thought she was Anne?

How do you kmow you are nuts if you think you are nuts?

are you nuts?
are you crazy?
are you silly? #:-)
are you a wacko?

you have got nothing compared to me!

silly Swine (++)

get the idea?

smile and have a good day, ya waterhead!

Chris- leading Trichinosis expert

OK..zit baeck und let der Doktor dezide if you arrre
NUTZ or not.

First za eesy vun....do you hate your gynacologist?

Do you haf feelings uf EUphoria (get it? EU..I sot dat vas a gut leetle pun) zat are unexzplainable?

Do you haf za dezire to chump into za fruitcake?

Do you find yourzelf vundering vy you call yourzelf Sow eins?

How much vood could a voodchuck chuck eef a voodchuck could chuck vood? HMMMMMMMM!?

Answer zeese qvestions und you vill be cured of your, in my humble diagnosis: Neurosis, bipolarism,schitzophrenia,Soiopathism ADD, STD, PDQ,ASAP, USA ALL THE WAY, and werewolfism.

Zat vill be $1000.00 us smackers right on za barrel head!

Dr. Ziema Bumshein, Ph.D, M.D., LSD
Head of gettin to za root of all grayziness here at Armorama!

Can i please make an appointment with the doctor...??Cause...seeing the types of topics i choose to work on...im a little on the nutty side myself:))

(++) (++) (++) Dr. Bumshein will be able to see you today at 4:30 pm. Please bring the following items with you to your appointment:
1 jar of vaseline
3 pr. rubber gloves
1 pr handcuffs
a cutting torch
a small bottle of grain alcohol
don't ask questions..he is a professional and knows what he's doing!
Please take this questionaire and fill it out completely leave nothing blank. Then return it to the receptionist.
Questionaire:
1. Who is your health insurer?
2. Will you be able to pay us?
3. If you are not able to pay us...how will we get our money?
4. Will you be able to make payments if you are not insured...(the Doctor needs a new set of golf clubs).
5. What is your bank code and routing number? ( so we can get our money)
6. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? ( The woodchuck would pay us!)
7.a. Did you ever do drugs?
7.b. If so, and you are uninsured, sell some so that we can get our money! (make sure to send some our way too)
8. will you be able to pay with a credit card...cause we need our money.
9. oh yeah..what exactly is wrong with you? But we ain't lookin' at you till we know we can get our money!

Thank you.
We are looking forward to seeing you today...provided we get our money!

Emma Gonatinkle
receptionist for Dr. Ziema Bumshein

short term memory loss, and a predilection for the intensely absurd is what has brought me to te conclussion that I'm indeed nuts.

Something about a truly off kilter philosohphical querry that I cannot discuss in threads. it's one of those that asks what is our most intense connection to God while still living. but not in the traditional sense. I came up with a doozie and my bestfriend once again told me I'm nuts as did quite a few other individuals. wrap your mellons around that for a while. and mail me back with your responses.lol

AAhhhhhhhhhh..................AAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........
mmmmmmmmmmmmm.................ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................................mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....................The topic is "WHAT IS CRAZY...I'll go for "what is crazy" for $800.00 Alex. The answer is "Who is Sow 1?" Excellent ...Bodeen that brings on to the plus side with $2.95! You're in the lead. Let's move to final Jeopardy. Contestants make your bets. Now for the final Jeopardy question.....How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Oh I'm sorry contestants...none of you got it right...you guys sure ain't no Ken Jennings' !
The correct answer is "A woodchuck could chuck chunks of wood, if a woodchuck could chuck wood!"

I'm sorry you are all three losers in this round.....but...isn't society the ultimate loser in this case? I mean when the average American can't even spell the word "A". When we can sue Mc Donalds because we weigh two tons and couldn't control our appetite and didn't have enough will power to say no.....and WIN a huge settlement!? When we all consider ourselves to be victims of some huge governmental conspiricy and wait for "Them" to give us some handout because we're too lazy to work for it ourselves!? People...listen...is our society going to hell faster than Adolf Hitler on a V-2 rocket!?
Nahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........we're ok! Just because you couldn't answer that stupid woodchuck question doesn't mean the fall of western civilization. It just means you don't know nuttin' about lumberjacking groundhogs!
Cheer up...you could have been playing "Wheel of Fortune"!
I hear VOICES!!!
Make them stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where was I????
Oh yeah...Dear diary (of a madman)....
(to be continued)

Ok, I obviously stand corrected, BODEEN is nuts.lol

I second that Anne...LOLOLOL

Sane people are boring. :-)

That's totally agreed Sticky, Sane people are boring, but there is a healthy line between fun insanity and " GOOD GOD GET THE THORZINE" and for some reason I think Bodeen needs thorzine.lol

What...widdel owd me!?
I need a lobtomy!!!!
Muhuhahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!

My Mother always said, becareful what you wish for, you just may get it!

OK....I'm back from my labotomy and boy do i feel wonderlicious. I feel like a hundred bucks. Man...i feel like I could take on the whole high school debate team and almost win.
You won't hear any more strange and absurd garble coming from this man's fingers anymore........... gngkjnsdnlnfgnsdkjfkjf.......gknsflnlfnsdlfnlsfnsd..... glksnfgng;jn;weonsfoncn......excuse me we haven't quite worked out all the bugs yet.
I'll tell you I haven't felt this good in seconds...aliens have invaded my body.....it really feels good to be "Sane" again....the voices told me I was sane!
It's great to have undergone a procedure which has changed my entire life....pigs are ruling the planet...I feel like a new person.....don't touch your dial, we have taken control of your computer...resistance is futile!
See...I told you.... all better!
Frinklespam wonkenlink until next time.
I think I just had Vuje De! It's the feeling that you haven't seen or done anything even remotely like that ever before!
Later..oh oh here comes that roller coaster ride feeling again...see you later Bodeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!

Ahhh,we are so glad the implanted chip is working so well.Now we know where you are at all times.We can even send you where we want at any time we choose.
like right NOW.
You will go to your local hobbyshop,and buy.Buy
Buy
Buy



Thank you for your cooperation.
"They."

Her junction box failed.........no electroshock
Her dishwasher broke.........no lobotomy
Her still was raided...............no need for the porcelain taxi
Her last nerve was touched..no smiley face
Too many kids........................no sanity #:-)
Too little time...........................who cares
Wished for something...........got nothing
Has no clue.............................never did
Oh well! Says silly things! HAHAHA! :-)

This was fun.........SHUT UP, Chris!

Hi Anne

SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAAAAAAAAM ...OH WONDERFUL SPAAAAAAM !
WHAT'S ON THE MENU?
WE HAVE SPAM AND EGGS. SAUSAGE AND SPAM ,SPAM SPAM AND FRIED POTATOES.
DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING WITH NO SPAM IN IT?
WE HAVE SPAM SPAM AND FRIED GREEN TOMATOES...THAT ONLY HAS A LITTLE SPAM IN IT!
OH BEHAAAAVE!
IT'S NOW TIME FOR THE PENGUIN ON TOP OF YOUR TELLY TO EXPLODE!
EVER HAVE THAT FEELING THAT YOU WERE A FIRE HYDRANT AND ALL YOUR FRIENDS WERE DOGS?
tHAT'S ME TODAY!

AAAAAANNNDDDDDDDD WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Now this is exactly why I start such nonsensical threads. because you guys make me laugh !

Now this is exactly why I start such nonsensical threads. because you guys make me laugh !