Have you ever wondered just how stupid some people can be??..Well here is a prime example..Enjoy...



This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless, to say the helpdesk employee was fired: however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."

Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support
Employee: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"
"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."

"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the c:prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
"Yes, I think so."

"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
"Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
"Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well can you see if it is?"
"No"

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"
"Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."

"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power outage."

"A power....A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the box and manuals and packing stuff you computer came in?"
"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!"

:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

Thanks! Made my afternoon!

I think there is a book in the making if you interviewed customer support people in all sorts of industries

Mary, I wish that one were really "a true story" but I've seen it attributed to Compaq, HP, Xerox, Microsoft, Dell, you name it.

These two are true stories that have actually happened to me. I used to work in inbound telephone sales for a large computer company. We'd get a lot of wrong numbers.

Back when Windows 98 was going over to 2000 I got a call from an older women asking me about the different types of windows. I started to explain about 95, NT, 98, and 2000 when she stopped me, wanting to know what I was talking about. I told her I was explaining the different types of windows. She asked, "what about the kind of window you open up to get fresh air?"

A while later I got a call from another older customer, this time a man. He said his doctor had asked him to get an "erectile pump." I had to really bite my tongue and not be sarcastic by saying, "unless that thing is controlled by a computer I can't help you."

These were both older people but believe me we got plenty of calls from younger ones that were nearly as strange.

There is another customer service myth passed around about the guy using the cd tray as hide-away cup holder.

hahahahaha :-) :-) :-) :-)
I needed a good laugh

Now you know the reason why I have the signature that I do.

There was a secretary who refused the IT department's assistance when she moved her office around. She said she could reconnect her computer on her own thank you very much. We said fine. 3 hours later I get a panic phone call that her computer won't work. i went down to her office and checked things out. Everything was connected correctly, except she'd plugged the power bar into.................................... the power bar. After that, she was very nice to those of us in the networking department.

try driving in Dallas and watch folks pull onto the INterstate at 15 miles per hour right in front of an 18 wheeler going 60. Come to think of it, it does make me laugh to watch them just about slam into guard rail trying to get out of way. Thank God I've never seen anyone get wacked. Oh they usually are SUV owners.....those folks seem to get into 90 % of the wrecks around here

635 at rush hour is my favorite. That and the twits that try to get into the HOV lanes from 3 lanes away when there is only 1 person in the vehicle.

HA! :-) :-) :-) i love it

Talking about trouble with computers, has anybody found the " any key " yet.....

Dave, you should have told her it was an I.D. Ten. T error. Ever hear of that one?

I've heard of it as I.D.10.T.

But my favorite is P.E.B.K.A.C.

Problem
Exists
Between
Keyboard
And
Chair

I've heard that as Chair to Keyboard Interface Defect

IF you now,or have ever worked in retail,you may like this............

http://www.customerssuck.com/

enjoy.......
Rick

Working in an IT support role in a previous company, we had our fair share of ‘problems’. One morning one of the IT support guys returned after repairing an error, muttering ‘I/O errors’ and how they should know better (I/O error = Idiot Operator).

Turns out the new receptionist, was formally a seamstress and while she was good at sewing, IT was beyond her grasp! She had reported a mouse error, when the support guy got there she had the mouse on the floor, operating it with her foot as you would a sewing machine’s paddle/speed control! :-)

lol we have a lot of fun with our apprentices lol. for example we send them in a hardware shop to buy a copper magnet or into a supermarket to buy a vegetarien ham-sandwich.or counter-balance for the hose-flower . or gearsand lol. or siemens air - hooks. or 90° angle-drills. or paper drills. or a paper-sledgehammer. no one ever said: does this things exist or something lol they always went to get them and we all had a geat laughter lol

Hey Max, Next time try sending them out for 50 feet of waterline and a bucket of prop wash.

On their way back tell them to pick up a set of metric adjustable wrenches.

lol thx, will do it tomorrow

I just try to remember that the person having the problem is an inDUHvidual and try to ignore them and fix the problem.