Here is just a couple of jokes i came across surfing the net..enjoy...
A man was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile. When the foreman asked the man why he kept painting less each day, he replied "I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can."
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Are You a Redneck Jedi?

You might be a Redneck Jedi if...

You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud
Light.

At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum
skeeters.

Wookies are offended by your B.O.

You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you
didn't have to wait for a commercial.

You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.

Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the
dark side...it'll be a hoot."

You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense
electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your
land-speeder.

You ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke
shorts.

You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get
in through the window.

Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the
Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood
deck.

You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina
scene.

If you hear . . . "Luke, I am your father . . . and your uncle."




:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

Them's good'uns. :-)